Under my thumb
The girl who once had me down
Under my thumb
The girl who once pushed me around
– The Rolling Stones
These week 17 NFL Picks have hacked the NFL standings and now the Cleveland Browns are undefeated. Yeah, we’re crazy serious!
We can do anything. Johnny Manziel is now officially a giant among men. That’s right. Don’t mess with us!
So Patriots fans, Seahawks fans, Packers fans…. sorry, but your Internet is down. Plus, and this is crucial for understanding us… We love exclamation points!
Use google, you doofuses! You’ll figure out that great football is Cleveland Browns football. Nothing else matters, certainly not the movie, “Draft Day,” which we should have hacked. But we like the movie, “Giant” because it is about Johnny Manziel.
One more thing. Happy Holidays. Sorry but nothing that you got for Christmas works. Certainly not Johnny Manziel!
And another thing. We’re not North Korean and the Browns aren’t really undefeated. This is surprising to you, and especially to us.
We are Cleveland-based sports hackers. We can prove it. Although we still don’t have the NFL code figured out, we did the code for Lebron James. You didn’t think that would work, did you?
Okay, that’s not true either. The truth is that we actually work for Justin Bieber. Dude loves vandalism, and he’s a big fan of Johnny Football. He is certain by next year that we’ll have this NFL code figured out.
In one year, Johnny Manziel will lead the Browns to the Super Bowl and Justin Bieber will be the halftime show. This is true. Only a real hack would declare that that’s whatzgonnahappen. Continue reading “Week 17 NFL Picks By The Sony Hackers” »